Just Ho Humming into the Holidays!

Well, I'm feeling much better now and should be 100% by tomorrow or Saturday. I was down with a pretty nasty cold, but at least didn't have a sore throat. Lots has been happening though in my own personal world of thoughts and decisions.

I had a great perf eval at the office yesterday and will be getting a small raise. The best part of it is not on paper but in the discussion I had with my boss regarding the upcoming year. Some may already know that for pretty much the past year, I've been "in charge of" the imaging project going on here at the office. It is progressing and within the next 4-6 weeks we will have finished the first big chunk, which is getting all of the active fleet files into the system. There is still much to do - inactive fleets, merchant files (active and inactive), permits files, and other small sections of files themselves, not to mention the eventual creation of a workflow that becomes entirely electronic. Anyway, also for the past year my boss has had me slated to become the manager of this department, which includes managing people (starting probably with 1 and growing to 2 or 3 over the next 3-5 years), making large and significant business decisions regarding how this department will operate and relate to the rest of the company, as well as the new processes mentioned above. I was honest from the day I interviewed for this position back in April of 2004, and have continued to be when a year ago he told me this is what he wanted me to do, that it was not what I was interested in doing, was not something I would enjoy doing, as well as not posessing the skills to do it. Well during this year as I've at least managed the part time workers and one full time worker since July in getting documents in I've been trying to come to grips with the fact that after the end of the year I would officially become the manager with the title, the responsibility, the extra money, etc. Because to this point, he really wasn't giving me much of an option. He believes that I have the capabilities and the intelligence to do the job and that I'm the best person for it, plus he trusts me without question.

Well, I was surprised yesterday when he sat and told me that as he wrote my revue he had to rethink his thoughts and actions for the past year that he's been pushing this. He has not changed his mind that I'm the best person to do this, or changed that he trusts me or that I can do it, but that maybe it really isn't what I'm looking for. We spent about half an hour talking in which he admitted that he truly wants me to be happy in what I'm doing, he likes and respects me and I will have a position in the company regardless of what I decide and he will support my decision. He still very much wants me to take the manager position, but has given me 2-4 weeks to really soul search and pray about where I want to go with my career and what makes me happy to come to the office every day. He realizes that I have a lot going on the personal side of my life and he realized that he'd probably been forcing this too much. He just feels that he's good at seeing talent in someone and then placing them in the best place to use that talent and forgets to stop and think about whether it's something the person wants to be doing.

So, all that said, I've got some time, but not endless time, to really consider both sides of the option now knowing that if I choose not to be the manager that there will still be a position and that we will work together to determine what responsibilities I would take on and do moving back toward more of a support or administrative role. Please be in prayer with me as I consider all the plusses and minuses to both sides of this situation. It truly is an opportunity that most do not get. If you have words of wisdom, comments, thoughts, questions, opinions I'd really appreciate all the input I can get at this point.

This of course is only one of a few serious-minded internal discusssions/decisions that I'm in the middle of but this is the one that came out when I sat down at the keyboard today. I'm definitely looking forward to spending the holiday with my "local" family this weekend! I'm looking forward to having the 3-day weekend and feeling well. I need to get some sewing done and maybe some scrapbooking too! I've missed both of these pastimes of late.

Well, I suppose it's about time to head home. I don't know that I'll get back to this before the holiday, so if I don't, please have a blessed and Merry Christmas and remember as you spend time in laughter and conversation with family and friends around the dinner table and unwrapping gifts around the tree that.... Jesus Christ is the originator or the reasons we celebrate. He GAVE - so we too give in His Name and in His Spirit. Please remember too... I know that there have been a lot of reminders to pray for our troops this season and the sacrifices that they and their families are making, fighting for our freedom, and while I totally agree and don't discount any of that (I too have family serving)... remember that there is an even larger army spread all over the world this season, they too are missing their families, they too are fighting for freedom for all mankind - those who are serving in the Lord's army, through many different organizations, to many people groups, in many countries across the world who need to be freed from the consequences of their sins by accepting the Lord Jesus Christ. May the message of Christ be advanced this season in miraculous ways through those who are giving their lives to serve, and may they be comforted and be at peace wherever they are whether they can celebrate outwardly or not that their light may still so shine among men.

God's blessings rain down!