This day... 16 years

November 4... this day has become a milestone day for me. It started 16 years ago today... that afternoon my life changed forever in a way I would never have suspected. Then for several years after that, November 4 was a very hard day for me. I tended to just back inside myself and keep away from as many people as possible and just get through the day, wishing it had never happened and that November 4 had never become an anniversary to me.

Now I can't tell you exactly when but sometime over the last 10 years or so, it has become a day that is still an anniversary to me, but that I can reflect on and see how many blessings I have that I might not have ever known if I hadn't turned down that path. So many lifetime friends that I wouldn't have known had I not chosen to get on a horse that morning. The opportunity to witness first hand what the power of prayer can do in my life. To really know by the number of visits and cards how many people in my life truly cared about me and my family - yes, we all have those people, but sometimes we take for granted how many of them there really are. Spiritual growth in my own life that came from a place where it was either grow and learn or lose it completely. The opportunity to be sunshine and light to two olders ladies whom I shared a room with in the hospital. To this day I still remember Margaret asking me each night to sing the Lord's Prayer as we were ready to fall asleep... and let's face it, laying in a hospital bed after what I'd gone through I did not have my best voice ever, but it meant something to her that's all I needed to know. And of course the many times since that day that sharing this story has helped me relate to someone or to share my faith with them.

For those of you reading this that may not know, on this day 16 years ago... at the age of 20, recently moved into my own apartment (in Indianapolis) since my parents had moved to Dallas, Texas on Halloween and I was determined not to move again, holding down two jobs... I was thrown from a horse while riding with people we knew from church and exploded a vertabrae in my back. Immediately I was in more pain than I could ever describe and couldn't feel or move from my waist down and was terrified that it was permanent. Praise God, it was not!! The long story made short... after 7-8 hours of surgery I spent 23 days in the hospital (the first 4 of those in ICU) and then at the beginning of December I was flown to Dallas where I began a long recuperation period. Just after the first of the year I found out that my full time job (I was on disability and they were waiting for me to return) would be gone as of June 1 because the company had been bought out and they would be closing our office. At that time I finally accepted the fact that for reasons never known to me, the Lord wanted me in Dallas. By that summer, I was all moved and back to work full time, this time in the Dallas area.

There are days I still wonder what my life would have been like had this tragedy not occured and I had gone on the path I'd started. But unlike then, I no longer think these thoughts with regret and bitterness. The Lord has so many times gently reminded me that He knows what is best for me and that some day I may know the reasons He sent me where He did. But even if I never know, I'm OK with that now. This is my Jonah experience, and I pray every day that since I learned this lesson the hard way, just like Jonah, that I would always be attentive to His call on my life and never refuse to listen to Him again.

One other piece to this whole story that I must relate to you is that my parents are true saints! I don't really know what they truly thought about the fact that I refused to move with them initially, but they treated me as the 20-year-old adult that I was and supported my decision to stay in Indy. They helped me find a place to live, they helped me work out a budget so I knew how many hours of part time work I needed to make ends meet. They helped me move for the the 5th time in just over 2 years (I had attended college for the 2 previous years) and helped be get settled before they left for the great state of Texas.

Then after my accident, my mother was at my bedside that night and back again to talk with the doctors before surgery the next day (my grandparents were with her as well). The only reason my father was not there was because on a Saturday night in a town they had only been in for 4 days there was nowhere to leave the dog and cat and he was supposed to have flown to Tampa for business on Sunday, which had to be changed. Sunday night after surgery, my mother and grandmother sat with me alternately through the night in ICU (yes, we bent the rules). Then out of the 23-day stay there was only one day my mother was not sitting there with me throughout the day. She and my nurses helped me relearn how to walk, she read to me, watched TV with me and while I napped (which I seem to remember was quite often) I'm sure she was not far.

When I went to Texas, initially for a recovery period, my parents made many sacrifices. They took care of me physically, they took care of my finances, they had my grandparents pack up my apartment and store it and my car, they dealt lovingly with me as I went through an emotional roller coaster that I hope you never have to ride. And finally, once I realized I would be in Texas permanently I lived in their home for the next 3 years! Grown children are supposed to move out, and my parents had always looked forward to that, they weren't like some parents that wanted to hold us back and keep us kids forever.

I know that parents are parents for life and that they did these things because they love me and wouldn't have thought of doing anything differently, but that makes it all the more special to me. I thank the Lord often that I have parents who love Him, who love each other (37 years and counting) and who love their children and grandchild with the kind of love that God has given them. The kind of love with no strings attached. The kind of love that does not expect anything in return, but rejoices when there is. The kind of love that heals, helps, and makes me smile! So, Mom and Dad, in case I've never said thanks for all you did in this particular situation, and for the uncountable other times that you've taken care of me because you love me, thanks, and I love you!